Karma bites Alan in the ass...
Posted: Fri Feb 14, 2014 10:25 am
This morning along Blenkinsop Michelle got a flat. As we were standing around as Hugh fixed it somebody mentioned that John Dower had a flat a while back, two of them in fact.
I joked: "couldn't happen to a nicer guy," feeling all smug, seeing I haven't had a flat all winter.
And two minutes later, big unseen pothole, BAM! Alan gets his first flat of the season.
Note to file: never, ever, ever, ever make fun of people getting flats unless you want Karma to bite you in the ass.
And I'll leave you with today's joke:
Chester and Earl are going hunting. Chester says to Earl, "I'll send my dog out to see if there are any ducks out in the pond. If there aren't any ducks out there, I'm not going hunting."
So he sends the dog out to the pond. The dog comes back and barks twice.
Chester says, "Well I'm not going to go out. He only saw two ducks out there."
Earl says, "You're going to take the dog's barks for the truth?"
Earl doesn't believe it, so he goes to look for himself. When he gets back he says, "I don't believe it. There really are only two ducks out there! Where did you get that dog"?
Chester says, "Well, I got him from the breeder up the road. If you want one, you can get one from him".
So Earl goes to the breeder and says he wants a dog like the one his friend Chester has.
The breeder obliges and Earl brings the dog home, tells it to go out and look for ducks.
Minutes later the dog returns with a stick in its mouth and starts humping Earl's leg.
Outraged, Earl takes the dog back to the breeder and says, "This dog is a RETARD. I want my money back!"
The breeder asks Earl what the dog did. So Earl tells him that when he sent the dog out to look for ducks, it came back with a stick in its mouth and started humping his leg.
The breeder says, "Earl, dogs can't talk. He was trying to tell you there are more f--king ducks out there than you can shake a stick at.
I joked: "couldn't happen to a nicer guy," feeling all smug, seeing I haven't had a flat all winter.
And two minutes later, big unseen pothole, BAM! Alan gets his first flat of the season.
Note to file: never, ever, ever, ever make fun of people getting flats unless you want Karma to bite you in the ass.
And I'll leave you with today's joke:
Chester and Earl are going hunting. Chester says to Earl, "I'll send my dog out to see if there are any ducks out in the pond. If there aren't any ducks out there, I'm not going hunting."
So he sends the dog out to the pond. The dog comes back and barks twice.
Chester says, "Well I'm not going to go out. He only saw two ducks out there."
Earl says, "You're going to take the dog's barks for the truth?"
Earl doesn't believe it, so he goes to look for himself. When he gets back he says, "I don't believe it. There really are only two ducks out there! Where did you get that dog"?
Chester says, "Well, I got him from the breeder up the road. If you want one, you can get one from him".
So Earl goes to the breeder and says he wants a dog like the one his friend Chester has.
The breeder obliges and Earl brings the dog home, tells it to go out and look for ducks.
Minutes later the dog returns with a stick in its mouth and starts humping Earl's leg.
Outraged, Earl takes the dog back to the breeder and says, "This dog is a RETARD. I want my money back!"
The breeder asks Earl what the dog did. So Earl tells him that when he sent the dog out to look for ducks, it came back with a stick in its mouth and started humping his leg.
The breeder says, "Earl, dogs can't talk. He was trying to tell you there are more f--king ducks out there than you can shake a stick at.