Pick your horror

[JTyre]

Rolf had a little boo-boo on this morning’s cross ride. Nothing fractured and the patient is doing well.

In lieu of flowers please send new kit.

[Alan]

You shoulda seen Rolf in the Emergency Room. Such a playful guy....

[Rolf]

You guys are almost as gross as my staples.

Thanks for being chums and wheeling me off for X-rays. I had to tell the technician I’d never seen you before—I think seeing men indoors in bike helmets was making him nervous.

Cyclocross is so fun!

[Greg F]

There's still insufficient detail on HOW Rolf was embarrassed.

If Alan and John weren't acting like these two, they were doing it wrong:

[Rolf]

Small rock face at Cattle Point, next to one of the cement boat launches. Alan eased down it nice and cautious-like and the angle didn’t look too bad, so I took it a little more briskly, not realizing there was a small patch of deeper gravel at the bottom. I buried my front wheel in the rocks and it stopped dead against the edge of the ramp—but my body kept going.

Still don’t know if the core sample was taken out of my knee by my bike or the boat ramp. Either way, it was a bit silly and entirely avoidable—as Alan demonstrated! (Um, and Johnny Tyre—who had immediately taken the ride-around, whimpering softly. )

[JTyre]

Rolf, I resent your “whimpering” characterization, but I must say that I saw no good coming out of that precipice. -- Johnny Tyre

[Bosie]

Who cares about Rolfs knee:

How is the bike?

[Rolf]

Hmm.. Ti CX frame, 105 components, lotsa heavy alloy parts: my bike’s fully prepared to be chucked off the back of a moving pickup—unlike my body.

The great thing about cross crashes is they happen at slow speed, relative to road incidents. Just one more reason to enjoy riding off-road!

[Alan]

For those who weren't there at Rolf's spectacular crash, you can imagine what it looked like with John and I providing first aid. It was kinda like this....